Addiction Recovery & Advocacy in the LGBTQIA+ community and beyond
A Q&A with Greg Giancola
This Q&A, facilitated by Jeremiah Gardner of the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, was originally published for Hazelden Betty Ford’s monthly Recovery Advocacy Update. If you’d like to receive our advocacy emails, subscribe today.
Following a successful career in advertising — at the center of the advertising world in New York City — Greg Giancola has reinvented himself. Like so many in recovery from addiction, he became drawn to service and helping others—a passion that led him to his current role as outreach manager at the nonprofit Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, where he is a force of healing and hope every day, empowering recovery and well-being for other individuals and families affected by substance use and mental health issues. As a gay man who knows firsthand the cultural stressors that contribute to higher rates of those issues in the LGBTQIA+ community, he is an especially strong advocate for recovery among his LGBTQIA+ peers and is among the leaders helping Hazelden Betty Ford expand its inclusivity. He now lives in Philadelphia and, in addition to his job helping families connect to care, Greg helps coordinate Hazelden Betty Ford’s presence in New York City’s Pride Parade (one of the two largest in the world) and annual Gay & Sober Conference. We checked in with Greg, who holds a master’s degree in Industrial and Organizational Psychology, to learn more about his passion for outreach and advocacy.
Q: What does recovery look like for you, and how has it empowered different aspects of your life?
For me, recovery represents freedom from the prison that alcohol and drugs kept me in for over 30 years. I was in my first treatment center at age 18, followed by three more treatment centers and being in a behavioral hospital for an attempted suicide. For years, I couldn’t acknowledge that I was powerless over drugs and alcohol and that my life was unmanageable. In actuality, drugs and alcohol made the decisions in my life and they created a world that was totally unmanageable in many ways. In April 2009, I finally surrendered and was willing to go to any lengths to stay sober. Since then, I have not had the desire to pick up a drink or use drugs in over 14 years. And for that, I am truly grateful.
In my addiction, I lost the ability to have true connections with people and I shut out family, friends, co-workers, God and many others. I was living in constant fear that life would never get better and, during those years, my self-worth was nonexistent. Recovery gave me back everything that I had loved, including myself. The power of choice has returned and I have learned to accept the things I cannot change and to live in the moment. I have replaced unhealthy habits with healthy ones and know the meaning of peace and serenity, something I never had in my addictions.
The joy has replaced despair and I have been reunited with many of the things that bring me true happiness: spending time with family and friends, skiing, traveling, the beach, theater, music, opera, museums, running, working out, meditation and prayer, and so much more. I also went to graduate school in recovery and earned a degree in Industrial and Organizational Psychology — something I thought would never happen. In 1990, after graduating from Boston University with a degree in International Relations, I was planning to go onto graduate school. My addiction had other plans and I moved to NYC to become a club kid, never going into the field I studied at BU. Drugs and alcohol had taken away all the good in life — recovery brought them back.
Recovery has also inspired me to work in the field of recovery. With the help of a career coach and my Higher Power, I found my way to the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation, a job that I love with all of my heart and soul. One of the most important aspects of my life is helping individuals find a pathway to recovery. Whether it is in my work at Hazelden Betty Ford or in the fellowships I belong to in my personal recovery, I get the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of other suffering from substance use disorders. It is truly a mission for me.
Recovery is not a bridge “back” to life, it is a bridge “to” life!
Q: What does it mean for you to share your recovery with others?
Every morning I pray and meditate to set the tone for the day and to connect with my Higher Power. In one of the prayers, it mentions removing obstacles in my life so that I can help others. In essence, that is one of the best reasons for me to share my recovery with others. I believe my sobriety and recovery journey is a gift, and the only way to keep it is to share it with others. Over the years, countless individuals have helped me in my journey by sharing what they had learned, so I feel that I have an obligation to do the same. No one has ever asked me to repay them for what they have given me. The only thing they have asked is that I pay it forward by helping the next person who comes along.
It is extremely important for every person in recovery to show the newcomer recovery is possible. The person with two days can show the person with one that they can get another day, and so on. By sharing my recovery, I am living evidence that others can achieve 14+ years of recovery, one day at a time. I truly get great joy from seeing someone’s life get better by what I have passed onto them.
There are many ways in which I share my recovery: I do service in Twelve Step recovery fellowships (chair meetings, make coffee, serve on committees, hold leadership positions, attend business meetings, etc), sponsor people, connect with my sponsor regularly, lead workshops at conferences, share in meetings, reach out to the newcomer, and help people through my work at the Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
Q: What would you like more people to understand about recovery?
First and foremost, it is important for people to understand that substance use disorder is a disease of the mind and body. It is not a moral failing, a lack of willpower in regard to substances, or anything else. Just like cancer, heart disease, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, etc., there are several approaches and paths to long-term recovery. Also, it doesn’t only affect the person afflicted, it affects the family and other loved ones, as well. Therefore, recovery is needed for all who are close to the person who is struggling with the substance use disorder.
For me, I needed to make many changes to my behavior and how I related to the world. To do that, I regularly attend mutual aid groups, see my therapist, go to my medical doctor when needed, eat healthy, exercise, pray and meditate, and help others. I have learned how to ask for help when needed and rely on others for support, something I couldn’t do in active addiction.
It is also important for people to know that recovery isn’t necessarily linear, and sobriety may not always be continuous. Just like a cancer which could come back after a period of remission, there can also be recurrences of use in recovery. We must extend support rather than criticize or condemn a person who returns to use, as we would never criticize someone if their cancer returns.
Q: How is your life as a Gay Pride leader and advocate for LGBTQia+ rights interwoven with your addiction and recovery experience, and your professional work today?
With the help of a very supportive family, I was fortunate to come out as a Gay man at the age of 18. During the mid 1980s, it wasn’t easy to identify as an LGBTQia+ individual and there were a lot of challenges affecting our community. Most notable was the AIDS crisis. At that time, I was attending Boston University, a liberal institution that already had a Gay group on campus. It was then I was first introduced to Gay Rights advocacy and activism.
After graduation, I moved to NYC and joined the groups ACT UP and Queer Nation which were fighting for the rights of the LGBTQia+ community and for those affected by HIV and AIDS. You could say that from an early age, I have been groomed to be a Pride leader and advocate for my community. Several years later, I had the opportunity to work for Planet Out, the largest LGBTQia+ media company in the world at the time. As one of the Advertising Directors, I was involved in many initiatives that supported our community and had the opportunity to represent my community on a global scale.
In April 2009, I got sober and carried that spirit of LGBTQia+ advocacy into my recovery world. I became involved with several of the sober LGBTQia+ conferences throughout the country including the Florida Round Up, the largest sober conference in the world. Last month, I was honored to be one of the presenters at the conference and was able to be of service during the event, as well. I also have done work with the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) and the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) as a sober member.
In a few weeks, I will be heading up Hazelden Betty Ford’s sponsorship of the Gay & Sober conference during NYC Gay Pride. Included in our participation will be a workshop given by our clinical team in Tribeca which will give our organization an opportunity to showcase our dedication to treating the LGBTQia+ community. Additionally, we will have a Hazelden Betty Ford banner on the back of a double decker NYC Tour Bus that will ride in the NYC Pride Parade. I’m excited that over a million bystanders will have the opportunity to view our support of the LGBTQia+ community.
Most importantly though, I feel blessed to be an example of what it looks like to be a proud sober Gay man and feel inspired to help others like me get sober.
Q: What should we do as a society to help more people establish and sustain recovery?
In my opinion, the most glaring factor preventing individuals from seeking help for substance use disorder is stigma. Society as a whole still has a long way to go in recognizing addiction as a disease. Prior to getting sober, I was not a bad person deserving condemnation by society for my addiction; I was a sick person deserving help so I could recover from my illness.
Last November, I had the opportunity to attend the HelathKey Summit in Philadelphia with Hazelden Betty Ford VP Bob Poznanovich. The forum was hosted by Daniel Hilferty, CEO of Independence Blue Cross and Blue Shield and attended by many CEOs in the healthcare, media, and financial industries. In his talk, Mr. Hilferty pointed out that many organizations offer great behavioral health benefits to their employees but do a poor job in conveying the message that it’s OK to have a problem with substances and to seek help.
I also see disapproval and rejection within families regarding substance use disorder. When I was being admitted to my first treatment center at age 18, my father did not want to recognize that I had an illness. At the time, he thought I just needed to be tough and control my drinking. Being a very well known and respected individual in his community, he was ashamed to have a son that had problems with alcohol and other drugs. Today, he is very proud of me for my recovery and is an advocate for substance use disorder treatment. He often calls me when he knows someone who is struggling with the disease and needs help.
I am vocal about my recovery because I feel it is very important to show society that people can change and that folks who struggle with substance use disorders are not bad people needing to be good but sick people needing to get better.
